What Conflict Looks Like (and What Peace Looks Like) to Children When people divorce, they often go into fight or flight mode – for many people the conflict of divorce feels like fighting for their very survival. That may be a natural, even primal response, but many divorcing couples are working through the feelings of fight or flight and learning to move through the conflict into a … [Read more...]
Divorce Poison and Dr. Richard Warshak
Understanding the Trauma and Permanent Damage Bad-Mouthing can cause in a Divorce In 1993, I had a case where the mother, who had chosen to have a career that forced her to commute every day, thought that because she was the mother of the child, she basically had divine right to move the child away from the town where the father lived. The father had chosen to stay in a local (and lower … [Read more...]
The Future of Marriage
A New Phase Arising in Marriage Dynamics I regularly read books on marriage, divorce, and parenting because I deal with families and relationships in my work every day. So if there is some idea or resource out there that would be helpful to my clients, potential clients, or even just people in general, I want to offer it to them. More and more I am seeing clients who list their top … [Read more...]
End of Life Lessons from Former First Lady Barbara Bush
As Former First Lady Barbara Bush was facing her end of life decisions, she taught us all how to die. As Jacquielynn Floyd, with the Dallas Morning News, told us in her article today, “Advice From the First Lady: Barbara Bush Offers Us a Parting Gift,” Barbara Bush has been made those end of life decisions with her typical grace and class. I recently read a new book called, "At Peace: … [Read more...]
How To Tell Your Family and Friends About Your Divorce
Years ago, I had a collaborative divorce couple who were particularly progressive in their thinking. They wanted to know the best way to tell their family and friends about their divorce in a way that would prevent their family and friends from feeling that they needed to take sides or criticize one or the other of them. It is only natural to feel the need to support your family and … [Read more...]
Raechel Parolisi: The Dangers of Not Using an ERISA Attorney When You Divorce
As a family lawyer who is Board Certified by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization, I can tell you that even most board certified lawyers are not experts in retirement benefits; I recommend that when you need a specialist, you should be sure to ask for one. For additional information, here is an article that was published by the Dallas Bar Association by Raechel Parolisi, the person I … [Read more...]
What happens in Texas if you die without a Will?
If you die without a Will, what happens? One of my colleagues says, “Texas writes one for you.” What he means by that is that the Texas Estates Code determines how your property will be divided if you do not indicate your wishes in a formal Will. For the vast majority of people, doing a Will is inexpensive and simple. But if you die without one, what would have been simple, may … [Read more...]
What Will Happen to Our Retirement in Our Divorce? And Why Do I need a Retirement Benefits Attorney?
In many divorces, the largest asset is the couple’s retirement, although many couples do not think about that because their retirement is still a way off. It could come from a private sector plan including a 401(k) or a profit sharing plan, a plan for public school employees such as a 403(b) or Teacher Retirement System of Texas (TRS), a statewide governmental plan like the Texas Municipal … [Read more...]
“Love, Honor and Negotiate” – Pre-Marital Agreements as Insurance for Your Relationship
Whatever the long-term relationship status might be, it is a good idea to have a pre-marital or cohabitation agreement. Why? Many people are now waiting to marry until later in life. Some do not marry at all, but are in long-term co-habitation relationships. Psychologists and other social scientists say this is because of one or several possibilities: the expectations of … [Read more...]
How to Start Your Marriage Off Right
Considerations for A Pre-Nup (called Pre-Marital Agreement in Texas) People don’t usually think about using the Collaborative Law Process for crafting their Pre-Marital Agreement, but I think it’s much better than the traditional way of negotiating these agreements. The traditional way for a Pre-Marital Agreement is for one side to go to their attorney and ask their attorney to draft … [Read more...]
