I regularly hear from clients, especially early in the divorce process, that they are overwhelmed. Sometimes, they are shocked by their spouse asking for the divorce or sometimes they discover that their spouse has cheated on them, either with another person or in how they have managed the finances. Usually, the client who has decided to leave or has committed the wrong has had lots of … [Read more...]
The Role of Listening and Asking Questions in Divorce, Pt. 2: The Crucible
Most of us are familiar with the Arthur Miller play and recent movie, “The Crucible.” The definition of crucible from the Meriam-Webster dictionary, is as follows: Definition of crucible a vessel of a very refractory material (such as porcelain) used for melting and calcining a substance that requires a high degree of heata severe test; “He’s ready to face the crucible of the … [Read more...]
What’s the Role of Listening and Asking Questions in a Divorce? Pt. 1
When I was a little girl, I had a grandmother who said, “We have two ears and one mouth because listening is more important than speaking.” That grandmother frequently annoyed me with her cliche sayings, but after over 35 years in the practice of law, I have come to appreciate that saying. So, what is the Role of Listening in a Divorce and other Conflict Resolution? At the University of … [Read more...]
The Dangers of Writing an “Online” Will
I am representing a family right now, who are still in the grieving process of losing a family member to cancer. They are a family who doesn’t have a lot of money, and now, because no one advised them properly on how to list beneficiaries on a life insurance policy, they are going to have to come up with the money to file a probate case, and in the end they may never get any of the money that … [Read more...]
Writing Your Own Divorce Story, Pt. 2.
A couple of years ago there was a story in the Dallas Morning News, entitled, “Bowing Out on Her Own Terms.” It was a story about an artist, Betsy Davis, who developed Lou Gehrig’s Disease/ALS several years ago and was taking advantage of the newly passed California physician assisted suicide law. The article gave details of how this former artist was able to invite and spend a last … [Read more...]
Writing Your Own Divorce Story, Pt. 1
When I was a little girl, I stayed most days with my beloved grandparents while my parents worked. My memories with them include their prompting me to sing “I’m a Little Teapot” and twirl around dancing in their kitchen. They called me their “Pride and Joy.” So, the day I walked in on their discussion where one of them said, “I think we need to get a divorce,” is one of the … [Read more...]
Coronavirus Fears and the Gray Divorce, Pt. 2: What is a Gray Divorce?
Why does Gray Divorce have its own category? In part 1 of this series, we reviewed the evolutionary factors that have gotten us as a society to this phenomenon known as the “Gray Divorce.” So why does it have its own category? There are several reasons for that: People in the category of the “Gray Divorce” are typically Baby Boomers who want more out of life than just financial … [Read more...]
Coronavirus Fears and the Gray Divorce, Pt. 1
Even before the Coronavirus, our society has experienced a trend in divorces, primarily from people over 50 – what is commonly called the “Gray Divorce.” Now that the Coronavirus has emerged, that trend seems to be continuing and even increasing. Psychologists say that crises, such as a death in a family, either strengthens or weakens a relationship. So, in the case of the Gray … [Read more...]
Your Children’s Financial Literacy May Determine If They Get Divorced
Most of us learned about money management from our parents – whether they intended for us to learn from them or not. In a previous blog entitled, “Your (and Your Spouse’s) Financial Philosophy May Determine Whether You Get a Divorce,” I talked how different financial philosophies (and sometimes the lack of any financial philosophy) can cause a divorce. But when you think about it, all of … [Read more...]
Collaborative Divorce Prevents Emotional Incontinence
Most of us don’t think about having incontinence until we are older and even then we hope that won’t be something we suffer from. I heard the word “incontinence” used in a new and quite accurate context today. I was reading one of the news advice columns today, this one by Carolyn Hax with the Washington Post, and she used the term “emotional incontinence” for someone who couldn’t control … [Read more...]