I have heard many clients say, “I would step in front of a train to save my children.” Most parents would die for their children, but, sadly, many are not willing to do the hard work to forge a good relationship with their ex for the sake of their children. What that says is that being nice to their ex may be harder for them than stepping in front of a moving train. And maybe it is, but my challenge to those parents is, can you put this in perspective? You are willing to die for your child, but can you also be willing to LIVE for your child, even if it sometimes feels harder than stepping in front of a moving train? I suspect when some divorcing parents think about this, they will begin to understand that talking the talk of stepping in front of a moving train is much easier than walking the walk, LIVING for their child and learning how to do and doing the hard work of co-parenting with an ex they may not even like. But if they begin with small gestures, even if they are not reciprocated, they will demonstrate for their child how much they love them and how important it is to them that they have a good relationship with BOTH their parents and BOTH sides of their family. This isn’t always easy, and it is much easier is both parents participate in the process of learning to get along. I suggest that the ending of every relationship involving children, whether the parents are married or not, need the support of a professional team (including counselors, lawyers and financial planners) to help them navigate through these potentially perilous waters. The following article from the Huffington Post gives parents some tips on how to successfully develop and nurture their co-parenting relationship, which by all studies, is overwhelmingly better for the children of any relationship, married or not.
Camille Milner is a divorce lawyer, who practices in Denton, Sanger, Highland Village, Flower Mound, Argyle, Frisco, Lewisville, and Carrollton and the surrounding areas. To schedule an appointment, call 940-383-2674.